photos from the rat and the monkey's wedding

Parlez-vous francais?

Yesterday I got to speak to the lovely La Gitane, in person. A truly rare treat.

Sackboy has arrived

Bloody Royal Mail have been totally crap at delivering my Amazon book. Firstly, it's way late. And when it does arrive I get not one but two slips saying it's too big for the letterbox but the lazy post-person can't be bothered to fill out any of the boxes telling me where it is, when to expect it and whether to wait for redelivery or go to the sorting office.

Eventually, I schlepp to the sorting office. Illegal parking. Kids screaming in car. Huge queue. Yadda. Who needs this? Until the parcel ain't no Amazon book, but some mystery white box from abroad.

Get home, rip it open in anticipation and... (Caveat: Polly Filler moment will ensue. Apologies in advance to anyone, like me, who thinks exclamation marks should be banned from copy)

...I have a sackboy! I have a sackboy! I HAVE A SAAAACK BOYYYY!!!!!

And not just any sack boy.

Custom-made, hand-knitted, all the way from Hong Kong!!!!!!!
And it comes complete with beret, tie, shoes and boa.


The story behind sackboy is that as soon as I discovered the cute little blighters had been translated into a knitting pattern by renowned soft toy designer Alan Dart, I politely asked (=instructed) my incredibly talented French friend, Jessica (otherwise known as La Gitane in London Bridge, currently masquerading as a monkey) who just happened to have taken up knitting last year, to knit me one.

And she did!!!!!!!!!!!

Jessica now officially tops the global cool list. Well ahead of Arsene Wenger. Sliding past Nelson Mandela. Move over Thierry Henry, there's a new dude in town.

Two most excellent pieces of post in a week. How sick is that?

The shorthand version of the longhand version of shitty christmas

I started writing this longhand version of why the run up to Christmas was so shitty, but it's taking forever and time is precious and all that, so the shorthand version is we were all horribly sick most of the time and 2 days before Christmas I lost my job because our company couldn't survive the collapse of the Icelandic bank system and I still don't know if I'm going to get paid this month.

Clearly, there is a lot more to get off my chest, particularly about being unwittingly unemployed in the midst of a deep recession, but we've finally had a good run of form so I'm not going to ruin it by moaning. Christmas Day at Auntie Seema's was most excellent. As was Boxing Day at London Zoo. As was the day after Boxing Day when La Gitane and Krusty came to stay before hopping on a plane back to HK. As was the day after the day after Boxing Day when Richard, Hilary, Danil and Seriosha came for a visit. I've eaten a LOT of cake. It feels good.

misery loves bloggery

dear whoever forgive me for i have sinned. it's been about 3 weeks since my last entry...

why oh why is it always the shite times that draw me to the keyboard? i could, for example, have written something last week when jambeans' nose stopped running and she was on brilliant form, and the sun came out and it was gloriously hot, and we went to steve and jessica's for lunch and auntie jessica took beautiful photos of everyone (except the one where i've got about 3 chins) uncle steve did roly poly's for jasmine and made her squeal with delight.

or i could have mentioned how nicky and i had a fab day at work last friday organising our team's magical mystery challenge as we leave our beloved london office for watford and the local asda.

or 2 days ago when i got a pink pass (outlaw in town so i got cover) and jessica and i went and pampered ourselves at the dorchester, which was ay-may-zing, then we had haircuts and i went and bought lots of clothes that are scrummy and actually fit my growing bump, and in the evening the bf took me out for a lovely meal, and it's only the second meal out we have had on our own since jambeans was born and the first one didn't really count so it was extra special and scrummy and lovey-dovey.

but instead i'm compelled to moan in type about the shitest day from shiteland i have had today. jasmine has conjunctivitis again, and after a minor row with the bf about who should stay at home and look after her today (my view - definitely his turn after i took time out of work a few weeks ago even though it completely screwed my week up) he asked his mum to stay on for an extra day (got the benefit of a willing and doting babysitter but... well, you know what) so he could do his meeting in the morning and come home this afternoon, which he did, and i managed to get away early from a tough day at work, where serious weirdness has happened (more later) and when i got home jambeans screamed blue murder (plus iGoo, snot, tears, writhing, more snot, more tears, inconsolable wailing and did i mention the earth shattering screaming?) for 90 minutes and i thought, after half hearted attempts to feed her and get her to sleep, that it was a tantrum, and i should just ignore ignore ignore, but turned out to be real, actual pain and discomfort soothed only by bf actually trying to do something to help, and giving her some ibuprofen, a chocolate biscuit and a cuddle on the sofa when she fell asleep, leaving us seriously stressed out and, for my part at least, GUILTY guilty guilty that i didn't try harder to make it better, and at the back of my mind all the time i'm turning, turning, turning over this weirdness that has happened at work, where two people that i used to manage, so worked with very closely, have outed themselves as a couple, and the chap has left his partner of quite a few years (wife of 2 years) and 5 year old daughter and 18 month old son so he can be with the chap-esse, and they are both very professional at work and i have a lot of time for them and i know nothing of their home lives, or whether they have been very unhappy in their previous situations, or whether it's the right thing or not for all involved and in my head i KNOW that i should be dispassionate and non-judgemental but in reality i just feel very upset about a situation that has absolutely nothing to do with me, and that's making today particularly shite because it's an emotion that i do not understand at all why i am feeling it.

and steve and jessica are going to hong kong because steve has got a job, and even though it really is the most fantastic news i am simply gutted they are going.

2 days of hell followed by 2 days of heaven

Had to take Jambeans to hospital just over a week ago. She caught a virus that went to her chest and couldn't breathe easily, and was slipping in and out of consciousness at one point. Mum was with me - we'd arranged for her to come and visit on my day off so I could have a hand - which was a real blessing, though I was a bit mean to her because Jambeans had been so difficult since the morning and I was sooo tired and emotional and finding it hard to cope that when she did turn up after a pretty long commute she had to contend with a very grumpy and snappy babymomma. But thank god she was there because it helped me make the decision to take the bub to hospital.

When we got there it wasn't too busy and they took one look at the bub and fast-tracked her right through triage. Then they gave her oxygen and a course of nebulizers over the next few hours that seemed to help enormously, plus a bit of paracetamol and ibuprofen for the temperature. Jambeans behaved enormously well, given that she was confined to a single bed for hours, but she was so poorly she didn't feel much like scrumbling around until much much later, when we were all knackered and she was perking up.

They discharged us around 11pm - we had got there at 4pm and bf had joined us straight after work - so we were all beginning to find it a bit of an ordeal.

Next day was uber tough too as we were so knackered. It was my first Friday working since going up to 4 days a week but I didn't go in and stayed home to help Bf look after the bub.

Steve and Jessica (la Gitane) were coming for dinner so we had an italian picnic (ie - no cooking involved) in the garden and it very chilled and wonderful and set the tone for two glorious days of sunshine and happy baby ahead, so we went back to Kew gardens and got totally blissed out again.